Even if people question your story. Tell it anyway! Here is part of mine, may it help somebody:
Today what you see is who you get! This is the REAL ROBIN 🙋🏻♀️
Next month I would have been married 34 years. Most of my marriage years I battled silent depression. 😔 Mostly because I was trying to fight with my own self to make a marriage work when it was out of order from the beginning. It used to get me so down because I kept thinking something was always wrong with me. I felt I wasn’t good enough. I felt like the more I spoke my concerns and I cried, I would only be told that I was too emotional.
At age 19 I took a bottle of pills. 💊💊
I had been married less than a year and was feeling rejection all over again from my childhood and I had taken it into my marriage. ⏩ My mother was having dreams about me being in prision with a shadow over me. 💬 When she asked me was I okay I told her yes of course. 🤦🏻♀️And I covered up what physical and emotional pain I had going on in my life. Nobody knew the silent times I battled within my own head. I wanted to just sleep forever and hope the pain would go away. 😴
I woke up that next day in shock. No stomach pumping no death. 😲 But I was still alive. I didn’t even know what the word purpose meant. But I knew God must have wanted me to carry on.
I did. For many many more years I went through emotions of living. ⏩ I faked so much and I continued to love so hard. 🤷🏻♀️💕💯 😷
Over the years I would cover up tears because of being told by people I’m over rereacting and I’m supposed to be happy. I was always complaining and negative because of my toxic environment. I allowed it. And I’ve never accepted myself as a victim but I covered up that fact that I was dealing with issues and I never faced them because nobody wanted to listen. So I kept on going trying to find my way. ⏩⏩⏩⏩
How in the hell did I get through it and become the robin free bird 🦅 that I am today? I pushed through the pain. I made bad choices and I also made good ones. But I chose to finally love ❤️ myself even if I didn’t feel it at times. Whitney Houston says the greatest love of all is learning to love ourselves. We have to be willing to find that.
Since I walked out of a marriage of 28 years and I chose to find my true self, it’s been hard. Especially it’s hard on holidays and anniversary’s such as this week. But what helps me cope and get through it without ever going back to a depression state of mind that I had at age 19 is, I get the understanding of Vision with helping others be free to open up and talk about their pains. I found compassion in listening and realize through stories of others, my life wasn’t the worst just different. I choose to speak affirmations over myself everyday. 🗣I choose to search out this God who lives in me and makes me feel and know I’m His. I choose to talk to people and not wear a fake mask anymore. 🤡 My marriage wasn’t the problem of my pains. It was the emotions I let control me during my marriage and even from my childhood rejections. 🥴
If you are dealing with a divorce or breakup of any relationship personal business or even church, I challenge you to fight your way back to find who you are and become the free bird from the cage of mental bondage. You have the power within to take your life back and get on the right track for you! Love yourself enough to overcome your obstacles by finding that greatest love of all within. I believe in you and I’m praying for you today!! 🙏
I don’t want anyone having to wait 30 years to fall in love with self like I did. I tried it my way by putting up walls and fake fences but when I finally saw that there was a life of freedom to love myself beyond all those trees 🌳 I discovered that there was so much potential waiting on my arrival. 🙌🙌🙌This is why I say “everything attached to me wins” 🤝 because I used to be attached to everything that caused me to loose. And it was stuck in my mind that I couldn’t overcome.
Last year On what would be my marriage Anniversary of 33 years. In recent years, I was one of the Speakers for #itsmakeoverseason with ShePowerment Movement TV and Lashann Broaden sharing my own personal story how I fought depression and got my healing. I also modeled for her fashion video too. I also speak on a Domestic Violence Summit panels telling my testimony as an OVERCOMER. Every time I speak it gets easier and easier to share my story.
Today I am a domestic violence advocate, author, magazine columnist, actress, Talkshow host interviewer, community connector, ambassador, curvy girl model & publicist to support and promote others. ☑️🌺⭐️🌞🌾🌈🌤✍🏻🗣🫂👣🎬🎯🚗✈️🌇🎥🪜🎊🖼📚💘 🇺🇸 ➡️ Focus Forward with Robin ⏩⏩⏩🇮🇳 🇦🇺 🇮🇹 🇲🇽
But when it’s all said and done I know I am a child of God that lives with life on purpose with purpose and that means more to me than any recognition I could ever receive. Nomatter what people think, I know my reasons and my whys for God giving me breath and my daily wake up call! Rise up and catch it!
Robin Shockley. 🥰💯🙌🙋🏻♀️👍💕✌️🎶